Exposing My World

I'm definitely a pessimistic person when it comes to all things. I look to the negative side things first usually before I show or say the positive side. I may not always say the negative thoughts first but I do always think them. I can see the most beautiful girl and I'll instantly in my head pickout her flaws and sometimes dwell on the negative rather than the obvious positive to the point that it clouds my head with worries of what others would say if I was with her.

I'm a dreamer. I'm an idea person. I'm not organized. I don't implement things well. I lack direction.

Changing to a positive way of thinking has been creeping up on me the last year or so. The Ben Lee record "Awake is the new sleep" is such moving record and really made me second guess how I react and think on my first thoughts and decisions. It's funny how easy it is in life to be negative, or do bad things. For me at times it seems like such a task to think positive and do nice things for people when its out of my way. I'll sometimes do nice things for a girl when I know it'll get me something in return. I hate being that fuckin' shallow but it is just built into me, a fight I don't think I can win. The Ben Lee record just tells you its scary to change but the rewards of thinking positive are endless even if you aren't getting anything in return.

A new song "The Adventure" (Buy it on itunes) I downloaded today from Tom Delonge's new band Angels & Airwaves formely of Blink 182 is a fuckin awesome song. Its one of those singles I download and I could keep playing it over and over. Its just such a positive sounding song I really love it. It's all about change and I so dig it. I want to change my music writing style from sad, I'm so hurt love songs to happy hope filled in love songs. It's hard to write music like that without sounding cheesy but I'm going to do it after I finish the remaining songs on my new album.

gregg